Is Your Dream Actually Yours?

I'm not here to tell you to follow your dreams or be yourself, because if you're not already doing that then a pair of cliches is not going to change that.

And the harsh truth is that most people are not doing that, and it boils down to three reasons:

1. You don't actually know who you are.

2. You're misaligned with the soul.

3. Your dream is just an image of another man's success.

This blog will make you uncomfortable, and it will make you question yourself. It's not a regurgitation of the same material you see floating around on the internet or in "self-help" books, but be thankful for that because your mind is questioning the fundamental assumption that it has built its foundation on.

Think of it this way: it's much harder to dismantle and rebuild a house than to let it give in to the poor terrain that it was built on until it crumbles. Which house do you want to be?

In this blog, I will guide you to figure out if your dream is really your own, and I will share with you three steps that I've personally used to get to the point where I am right now, and I will continue to use to get to the point where I am in the future.

Step 1: Monitor Your Daydreams and Fantasies

We all create these brilliant stories of ourselves in the future where we're living out our dream, we're living our best life, but really analyze what it is you're looking for in these daydreams.

If you want to be a YouTuber, then what part are you fantasizing about? Is it going out in public with your camera and speaking in front of strangers, or is it imagining the attention that your fans will give you in the future, or is it this idea that to so many people in the world, you'll finally be something? Are you daydreaming about being a YouTuber, or are you daydreaming about being perceived, viewed, and valued as a YouTuber?

You can apply this logic to any career path that you want to go on, and there's no problem with wanting to be rewarded for what you want to do in the future in and of itself, but if the idea of your dream is just how you'll be perceived, then that is not a dream of yours. That's a mechanism that your insecurity is using to steal attention for made-up scenarios from the future that does not exist. Be careful of that.

The Danger of Result-Only Dreams

Also, be careful of toxic dreams that are 100% unrealistic results. If you want to be a football player, all of your dreams are simply winning the games - not catching a pass, running through a guy, tackling a guy. It's just about winning and being a winner. The process will be scattered with losses. You have to be able to look at the losses as lessons. If you can only look at the losses as shoves, pushes, and slaps rather than lessons, then perhaps it's not what you want to do that's your dream, but the result.

And the danger with this is that there are two outcomes.

Either you get the result and realize that this was never what you wanted, and because of that, you will go into a great, scary, dangerous depression.

Or most people, if they have dreams of being rewarded with something in the case, they don't end up doing it. And this is tragic, because for the rest of their life, they're solely leeching off that idea. They're slowly stealing more and more from that cookie jar. You see these people that say, "Oh, I could have went pro if it wasn't for the injury." It wasn't the injury that's the problem. It was your drive. You weren't connected to your dream as much as you thought you were, and that is discounting your mindfulness, your identity, and your soul's presence in the moment. That's the most toxic thing you can do for yourself.

Step 2: Think About How You Approach Your Dream

If you think you want to be a doctor, but you can't bring yourself to study or apply to medical school, do you really want to be a doctor? If you have the ability to procrastinate your dream, then that's probably not your dream.

You would never see a hungry dog abandoned on the side of the road making an excuse to not eat a chicken wing, a chicken thigh, even the bone of what was once a chicken wing. And so if you find yourself rationalizing and making up these terrible excuses for not following your dream, I think you can see very clearly that it's probably not your dream.

You wouldn't make an excuse not to eat if you were hungry. And if you don't have that same hunger for your dream, then it's probably not your dream.

If you want to be a YouTuber and you find yourself saying, "I'll record later," or, "I'm not ready yet. I don't know how to edit. I don't know how to speak in front of the camera. I'll do X when Y happens," then that's probably not your dream. That's probably not what your best path and your destined path in life is.

Which is fine, because now you're given the opportunity to rediscover what your destined path is.

It's like playing a video game. Would you really just want to follow a walkthrough, a tutorial for the whole game? Or are you fine with making mistakes because you know that will redirect you to the right path and the correct conclusion in the end?

Your life is a video game.

Personally, I get excited about the idea of learning something new about myself and following on my destined path. That excites me. That's what gets me up in the morning. I'm hungry for life. I'm hungry for my dream. I'm hungry to understand if this really is my dream, and if it is, then to actualize it.

I don't want to see soulless people walking on other people's trails. I want to see people making their own path, guided by the soul.

Step 3: Just Start

Which leads me to way number three, which is simple: just start.

Maybe you read the last two signs wrong and you thought that this idea was really your dream, and so you start on it but you realize it's not what you like to do. You had a different image in your mind than what actually happened, and that's fine because your soul simply provides feedback. It doesn't give foresight, it gives hindsight.

So as you walk along this trail that you believe is your path, the wind will whisper to you, "Hey, you got to go different direction." It will feel a little chillier, and that's another challenge from life itself, to find your path. That's the beauty of life, but unfortunately for most people, it is intimidatingly beautiful and they don't have the courage to follow along that path. I don't want that for you.

The Three Steps to Finding Your True Dream

Those are the three steps:

1. Watch and monitor your daydreams and fantasies

2. Watch your procrastination habits

3. Just start. Start right now.

See for yourself if this is really destined of you, if you enjoy the process of doing this day to day.

Let me know in the comments below if you want a complete guide, at least so far, what I've learned on how to listen to the soul and what it is.

Until next time, make sure you cultivate the self, align with the soul, and master the mind. Peace.